12.17.2008

Down

I hate that Mollie has a life threatening disease.
I hate that she has been in the hospital for nearly a week and can't even leave the room.
I hate that Matt and I haven't had a moment alone in over a week.
I hate that I am missing out on this fun stage in Lucy's life.

Sometimes it all seems surreal, like I will wake up tomorrow and everything will be back to normal. No clinic, no hospitals, no cancer. It breaks my heart to see everything that Mollie has to endure. That our family has to endure.

Right now I feel like breaking every window in the house. Instead, I will try to sleep. To rest and get ready to entertain, console, monitor, and love Mollie in the hospital tomorrow.

3 comments:

Lauren said...

Dear Sarah,

Thank you for writing about the things you are struggling with. I hate them too and I can't imagine how hard it must be for you and Matt and Mollie and Lucy. You have every right to be down and to feel angry. It's really not fair. I'm thinking about you every day.

Lauren

nea said...

I hate that you have to go through this too. You are in my thoughts every day, even if I don't make it to the computer for updates.

LSULiv said...

Awww! Yes, and the holidays just add stress to the mix. You want to be with your family in your home and able to enjoy the season. Perhaps when you look back on this, you'll still remember all the love that surrounded, despite the sterile surroundings. Hopefully some sleep makes you feel better and more ready to conquer what tomorrow will bring-- and hopefully that's MCK home.